It's funny how easy it is to take things for granted. I received a letter in the mail from Chase yesterday, telling me that they were raising the interest rate on one of my cards from 8.9% to 13%. Now, it's not a card that I use very often, but I was annoyed that they were raising my rates, so I canceled it. Things seem to be tightening up even for people with good credit scores, it seems. A month ago, this card was offering me a 3.9% balance transfer rate that was locked in at that rate until I paid it off. Now they're trying to raise my rate by 50%.
I called a friend yesterday to complain about the "lousy" raise I got this year. He didn't have much sympathy for me. His employer has frozen all salaries and is starting to institute furloughs.
I know I shouldn't complain. I had a pipe burst last week, but that is covered by insurance. I know I can carve the $500 deductible out of my budget somewhere... But it's easy to get discouraged as I sift through piles of books that were ruined by my flooded basement.
Maybe it's just the winter getting to me. I never did like the cold.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Sunday, December 14, 2008
I've been thinking a lot about comment The Rebbitzen's Husband left on my last bog post, the one about the man who was giving so much tzedaka that his family was suffering. The one question that I keep turning over and over in my head is-- should I try to do anything about it? Does my friendship give me the right to interfere?
I haven't been doing much interfering with anything recently. I've been spending a lot of time at home, trying to take care of things. One of my pets passed away, so haven't wanted to spend shabbos away from the ones that are left to me. I think they're mostly through the grieving process now-- or at least I am. I am a single, childless woman in my 30s. Pets are good substitutes for babies or... at least they're the substitutes left to me.
At any rate, I've had a number of shabboses at home to search for clarity and work on myself. I've started to work on my Rosh Hashanah resolutions:
I joined Partners in Torah and downloaded some shirim (although I haven't started listening to them yet.) Also, after shabbos, I sat down and wrote out checks to a number of causes I wanted to support. I hope they won't mind receiving a dozen post-dated $15 checks, but that was the easiest way to put my thoughts into action.
Partners in Torah is interesting. My partner is very nice, but I'm not so sure that I agree with a lot of stuff in the book we're studying. For example, one of the things I learned this week is that I'm supposed to have a dedicated shabbos wardrobe that is nicer than anything I wear during the week. Does she have any idea how much that would cost? Which shul should not get tzedakah money from me this year so that I can do this?
I haven't been doing much interfering with anything recently. I've been spending a lot of time at home, trying to take care of things. One of my pets passed away, so haven't wanted to spend shabbos away from the ones that are left to me. I think they're mostly through the grieving process now-- or at least I am. I am a single, childless woman in my 30s. Pets are good substitutes for babies or... at least they're the substitutes left to me.
At any rate, I've had a number of shabboses at home to search for clarity and work on myself. I've started to work on my Rosh Hashanah resolutions:
I joined Partners in Torah and downloaded some shirim (although I haven't started listening to them yet.) Also, after shabbos, I sat down and wrote out checks to a number of causes I wanted to support. I hope they won't mind receiving a dozen post-dated $15 checks, but that was the easiest way to put my thoughts into action.
Partners in Torah is interesting. My partner is very nice, but I'm not so sure that I agree with a lot of stuff in the book we're studying. For example, one of the things I learned this week is that I'm supposed to have a dedicated shabbos wardrobe that is nicer than anything I wear during the week. Does she have any idea how much that would cost? Which shul should not get tzedakah money from me this year so that I can do this?
Monday, November 10, 2008
giving too much
I recently discovered that someone I know is insisting on giving 20% tzedakah. Apparently there are special benefits listed in the gamara for people who give that much charity.
Of course, his wife went without a mammogram the other year because they couldn't afford one. His wife and children regularly visit the gamach for their clothing. His son didn't get even get a cake (home baked or otherwise) for his birthday. There isn't a dime put away for their old age.
A friend of mine has offered to assist with an upcoming simcha. What they don't realize, is that she is helping them out with *her* tzedakah money because *they* insist on giving 20% to others.
Sometimes, I wish someone would slip a word to their rav about this.
Is this an isolated instance of insanity, or are other people doing this too?
I suppose I don't have a right to be angry, but this feels wrong on so many levels.
Of course, his wife went without a mammogram the other year because they couldn't afford one. His wife and children regularly visit the gamach for their clothing. His son didn't get even get a cake (home baked or otherwise) for his birthday. There isn't a dime put away for their old age.
A friend of mine has offered to assist with an upcoming simcha. What they don't realize, is that she is helping them out with *her* tzedakah money because *they* insist on giving 20% to others.
Sometimes, I wish someone would slip a word to their rav about this.
Is this an isolated instance of insanity, or are other people doing this too?
I suppose I don't have a right to be angry, but this feels wrong on so many levels.
Monday, October 27, 2008
Is Sarah Palin Jewish?
(This post is an expansion of comments I posted on Frumpter's post: Is Sarah Palin Jewish. He, in turn, links to a number of related articles on the web.)
The short answer is: the "articles" I've seen on the Blogosphere offer no proof that she is.
I've been doing Lithuanian Jewish genealogy for only about 10 years, but this article struck me as wrong on a few grounds:
"Further information on Governor Palin's ancestors can easily be found in the vital records in the Lithuanian State Historical Archives in Vilnius."
I wish! Actually, the only known surviving birth/marriage/death records for Vilkavisis that are for birth: 1810-1811; 1876; 1922-1939
for marriage: 1810-1811; 1904/1925 (RECONSTRUCTED RECORDS); 1922-1939
for death: 1810-1811; 1877; 1880; 1922-1923; 1925-1939 (source: rtrfoundation.org search for Vilkavisis). RTR Foundation is an online database of known East European Jewish records.
Anyone who says that a Lithuanian genealogy can be "easily" found in the vital records is lying. LitvakSIG, a group dedicated to obtaining and transcribing Lithuanian Jewish Genealogy records, has been working on pulling these records out for years. It is NOT easy. (As a side note, LitvakSIG is hosted by JewishGen. They announced at the last International Association of Jewish Genealogical Societies (IAJGS) convention that they are in the process of moving to more robust servers. I don't think this has happened yet, so please be understanding if you have issues connecting to the site. LitvakSIG and JewishGen are non-profit organizations supported by donations, so please consider helping them out if you think that their work is valuable and interesting.)
Note that the critical year in the Palin case (1912) is not known to exist (source, record search on http://rtrfoundation.org/). The gaps in the records make it difficult to prove parentage with any certainty. Most of the Marijampole District records that can be obtained have been translated by LitvakSIG volunteers and donations. Note that the records during the time period we're talking about can no longer be obtained as they fall within the EU 100-year privacy blackout. LitvakSIG has some of these records (since the blackout was just instated within the past couple of years), but not all. An interested party can check out what is available on LitvakSIGs All Lithuanian Database and see just how difficult this would be to prove with any certainty.
Then there is another problem with the Jewish Sarah Palin theory:
"The Names Are Altered. At Ellis Island Immigration Centre, the name was entered as Sheeran, a standard practice when immigration officers were unable to understand the pronunciation of non-English speaking immigrants."
This is also less than true. The Ellis Island records were translated directly from the ship manifest. Transcription mistakes did happen, but this "standard practice" nonsense is a bubemeiser. You would need to carefully trace the family tree to see if you could map it back to the Ellis Island records. This can be done, of course. A combination of naturalization records, WWI/WWII registrations, census entries, city directories, voter registrations and U.S. birth/marriage/death records (among others) can be used to pinpoint the immigrant ship manifest even if the immigrant name was different on the manifest. You can then take that information to set up plausible connections to the surviving records in Lithuania (which may include census data, tax records and (if you're lucky, birth/marriage/death records). The Palin-is-Jewish story didn't offer ANY evidence that there is a shred of actual proof beyond "wouldn't it be cool if." You can't simply say that "Green" sounds awfully like "Greenberg," therefore the person must be of Jewish descent! Well, you could, but you would likely be wrong.
The third issue that raised a flag for me:
As for the cemetery, this is what seems to be popping up on Google:
"members of the Sheigam family are buried in the Jewish cemetery Budezeriai"
There may indeed be Sheigams buried in a Jewish cemetery at Budezeriai (I didn't bother to see if I could find the data online), but this is NOT proof that they are related in any way shape or form to Sarah Palin.
The short answer is: the "articles" I've seen on the Blogosphere offer no proof that she is.
I've been doing Lithuanian Jewish genealogy for only about 10 years, but this article struck me as wrong on a few grounds:
"Further information on Governor Palin's ancestors can easily be found in the vital records in the Lithuanian State Historical Archives in Vilnius."
I wish! Actually, the only known surviving birth/marriage/death records for Vilkavisis that are for birth: 1810-1811; 1876; 1922-1939
for marriage: 1810-1811; 1904/1925 (RECONSTRUCTED RECORDS); 1922-1939
for death: 1810-1811; 1877; 1880; 1922-1923; 1925-1939 (source: rtrfoundation.org search for Vilkavisis). RTR Foundation is an online database of known East European Jewish records.
Anyone who says that a Lithuanian genealogy can be "easily" found in the vital records is lying. LitvakSIG, a group dedicated to obtaining and transcribing Lithuanian Jewish Genealogy records, has been working on pulling these records out for years. It is NOT easy. (As a side note, LitvakSIG is hosted by JewishGen. They announced at the last International Association of Jewish Genealogical Societies (IAJGS) convention that they are in the process of moving to more robust servers. I don't think this has happened yet, so please be understanding if you have issues connecting to the site. LitvakSIG and JewishGen are non-profit organizations supported by donations, so please consider helping them out if you think that their work is valuable and interesting.)
Note that the critical year in the Palin case (1912) is not known to exist (source, record search on http://rtrfoundation.org/). The gaps in the records make it difficult to prove parentage with any certainty. Most of the Marijampole District records that can be obtained have been translated by LitvakSIG volunteers and donations. Note that the records during the time period we're talking about can no longer be obtained as they fall within the EU 100-year privacy blackout. LitvakSIG has some of these records (since the blackout was just instated within the past couple of years), but not all. An interested party can check out what is available on LitvakSIGs All Lithuanian Database and see just how difficult this would be to prove with any certainty.
Then there is another problem with the Jewish Sarah Palin theory:
"The Names Are Altered. At Ellis Island Immigration Centre, the name was entered as Sheeran, a standard practice when immigration officers were unable to understand the pronunciation of non-English speaking immigrants."
This is also less than true. The Ellis Island records were translated directly from the ship manifest. Transcription mistakes did happen, but this "standard practice" nonsense is a bubemeiser. You would need to carefully trace the family tree to see if you could map it back to the Ellis Island records. This can be done, of course. A combination of naturalization records, WWI/WWII registrations, census entries, city directories, voter registrations and U.S. birth/marriage/death records (among others) can be used to pinpoint the immigrant ship manifest even if the immigrant name was different on the manifest. You can then take that information to set up plausible connections to the surviving records in Lithuania (which may include census data, tax records and (if you're lucky, birth/marriage/death records). The Palin-is-Jewish story didn't offer ANY evidence that there is a shred of actual proof beyond "wouldn't it be cool if." You can't simply say that "Green" sounds awfully like "Greenberg," therefore the person must be of Jewish descent! Well, you could, but you would likely be wrong.
The third issue that raised a flag for me:
As for the cemetery, this is what seems to be popping up on Google:
"members of the Sheigam family are buried in the Jewish cemetery Budezeriai"
There may indeed be Sheigams buried in a Jewish cemetery at Budezeriai (I didn't bother to see if I could find the data online), but this is NOT proof that they are related in any way shape or form to Sarah Palin.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Simchat Torah
I had a girls-only Yom Tov. One thing that really troubled me at first was the separation of the sexes in Orthodox Judaism, but I've since started to see the value in a women-only community.
Simchat Torah was always problematic. Singing and dancing *is* a kind of prayer to me. I don't see Simchat Torah as one long party-- to me it is one long session of using our bodies and voices to get closer to Hashem. That's why it was so troubling when the women sat around talking or silently watching the men and children celebrate. I felt like a tree cut of from its roots, unable to tap into the energy and Connection that was forming on the other side of the mehitza.
It helped a lot to finally realize what my problem was. This Simchat Torah, I was introduced to the concept of shul hopping. My friends and I found places where I could sing without worrying about being overheard, where we could clap our hands and bob about in time to the music. I could participate, even if I couldn't find women interested in dancing with me. Even if I couldn't touch the Torah.
I've been working through my relationship with the Torah As An Object. I heard a rabbi talk a few weeks ago about the whether it was the Torah as a physical object that was holy or the words behind it. He raised the possibility that it was almost idolatry to venerate the torah the way some people have a tendency to do. The important part is what is written, is what is embodied within klal yisrael.
The meaning and energy that I crave so desperately shouldn't be tied to whether or not I can hold a Torah in my arms. When I first started to become religious, I would cry when the ark opened because it felt as if I was suddenly in the presence of Hashem. I slowly learned to take that-- whatever it was that I felt-- and find it elsewhere in the davening and elsewhere. I suspect that process will take the rest of my life, trying to bring that feeling of holiness to every part of my life.
Still, sometimes I want to take a shortcut and dance with the men. Sometimes it seems as if they have the easier path.
Simchat Torah was always problematic. Singing and dancing *is* a kind of prayer to me. I don't see Simchat Torah as one long party-- to me it is one long session of using our bodies and voices to get closer to Hashem. That's why it was so troubling when the women sat around talking or silently watching the men and children celebrate. I felt like a tree cut of from its roots, unable to tap into the energy and Connection that was forming on the other side of the mehitza.
It helped a lot to finally realize what my problem was. This Simchat Torah, I was introduced to the concept of shul hopping. My friends and I found places where I could sing without worrying about being overheard, where we could clap our hands and bob about in time to the music. I could participate, even if I couldn't find women interested in dancing with me. Even if I couldn't touch the Torah.
I've been working through my relationship with the Torah As An Object. I heard a rabbi talk a few weeks ago about the whether it was the Torah as a physical object that was holy or the words behind it. He raised the possibility that it was almost idolatry to venerate the torah the way some people have a tendency to do. The important part is what is written, is what is embodied within klal yisrael.
The meaning and energy that I crave so desperately shouldn't be tied to whether or not I can hold a Torah in my arms. When I first started to become religious, I would cry when the ark opened because it felt as if I was suddenly in the presence of Hashem. I slowly learned to take that-- whatever it was that I felt-- and find it elsewhere in the davening and elsewhere. I suspect that process will take the rest of my life, trying to bring that feeling of holiness to every part of my life.
Still, sometimes I want to take a shortcut and dance with the men. Sometimes it seems as if they have the easier path.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
trying to connect
It's really hard to step outside of yourself and really try to understand another person. Everything is seen through your own filter of experiences and prejudices.
For example, I connect to Hashem through tefilah and through community. It's important to me to be in a place where the davening has energy. It's important to me, on shabbos and yom tov, to be around other people who feel the same way. I hate davening in isolation.
There are other ways to connect to Hashem, of course. There are people for whom davening is simply a rote list of words that they have to get through. That doesn't mean that they're bad Jews. They might, for example, connect to Hashem through the intricacies of doing mitzvot. They might be rigid about their observance because that is the primary way they get close to G-d.
I don't think that many people are on one extreme or the other. Most of us are probably somewhere in-between. Still, it is so hard for me to understand someone who doesn't experience a close, emotional connection to Hashem through prayer. I don't understand wanting to rush through the prayers.
Why is it so important for me to understand another person? Why can't I just accept things the way they are?
The holiday season is becoming extended for me, elongating into what seems to be an endless period of reflection. Maybe I just need some time alone to think. I rushed into Rosh Hashanah and then into Yom Kippur. Sukkot came too fast for me to even take breath. This is not supposed to be a stressful time. This is supposed to be my "reset" button, my chance to start over. Instead, I'm looking at everything on my to-do list and wondering when I can curl up in some quiet corner with my cat and pretend that the world has gone away.
For example, I connect to Hashem through tefilah and through community. It's important to me to be in a place where the davening has energy. It's important to me, on shabbos and yom tov, to be around other people who feel the same way. I hate davening in isolation.
There are other ways to connect to Hashem, of course. There are people for whom davening is simply a rote list of words that they have to get through. That doesn't mean that they're bad Jews. They might, for example, connect to Hashem through the intricacies of doing mitzvot. They might be rigid about their observance because that is the primary way they get close to G-d.
I don't think that many people are on one extreme or the other. Most of us are probably somewhere in-between. Still, it is so hard for me to understand someone who doesn't experience a close, emotional connection to Hashem through prayer. I don't understand wanting to rush through the prayers.
Why is it so important for me to understand another person? Why can't I just accept things the way they are?
The holiday season is becoming extended for me, elongating into what seems to be an endless period of reflection. Maybe I just need some time alone to think. I rushed into Rosh Hashanah and then into Yom Kippur. Sukkot came too fast for me to even take breath. This is not supposed to be a stressful time. This is supposed to be my "reset" button, my chance to start over. Instead, I'm looking at everything on my to-do list and wondering when I can curl up in some quiet corner with my cat and pretend that the world has gone away.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
resolutions
I have been trying to make up all the hours from the holidays. That leaves me very little time to think, write, or do anything else.
I spent Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur davening for clarity. I didn't quite get the answer I sought, but I did get a list of things I need to do during the coming year. I know that they're all very small, basic things, but I'm not good at following through with grand changes. Baby steps are more likely to succeed:
1. Work on my Hebrew. I bought the interlinear Tehillim thinking that I could use it to practice my Hebrew and increase my vocabulary. I tried the same thing with a siddur last year, but I really don't have hours to spend each day on my prayers, so those need to stay in English for now. Surely I can read one Psalm a day out loud.
2. Get better about my after-brachas. It is NOT that hard to memorize the after-brachas, at least not the shorter ones. I need to stop being lazy.
3. Start donating to a BT learning center I particularly admire. I don't give nearly as much tzedaka as I should. One of my friends gave me the idea of sending in 12 checks, 11 post-dated. Surely I can find $15 a month in my budget for this.
4. Create (and stick with) a plan to get out of debt. All of my tax refund needs to go towards paying off debt. That will take care of my one high-interest credit card. After that, I need to divert the money I was paying each month on that card to my car loan. Where did I get the idea that 6% was an acceptable interest rate? The economy is pretty scary right now; I need to get my house in order!
5. Get better about housework. I can't find the key to the box where I keep my jewelry. I've even lost a siddur! I need to get this house clean and keep it that way!
6. This is the one that isn't so small... I want to get engaged. I want to settle down. I need to break through the one thing that's really blocking me from this.
I hope everyone had a productive fast and was sealed for good in the Book of Life.
I spent Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur davening for clarity. I didn't quite get the answer I sought, but I did get a list of things I need to do during the coming year. I know that they're all very small, basic things, but I'm not good at following through with grand changes. Baby steps are more likely to succeed:
1. Work on my Hebrew. I bought the interlinear Tehillim thinking that I could use it to practice my Hebrew and increase my vocabulary. I tried the same thing with a siddur last year, but I really don't have hours to spend each day on my prayers, so those need to stay in English for now. Surely I can read one Psalm a day out loud.
2. Get better about my after-brachas. It is NOT that hard to memorize the after-brachas, at least not the shorter ones. I need to stop being lazy.
3. Start donating to a BT learning center I particularly admire. I don't give nearly as much tzedaka as I should. One of my friends gave me the idea of sending in 12 checks, 11 post-dated. Surely I can find $15 a month in my budget for this.
4. Create (and stick with) a plan to get out of debt. All of my tax refund needs to go towards paying off debt. That will take care of my one high-interest credit card. After that, I need to divert the money I was paying each month on that card to my car loan. Where did I get the idea that 6% was an acceptable interest rate? The economy is pretty scary right now; I need to get my house in order!
5. Get better about housework. I can't find the key to the box where I keep my jewelry. I've even lost a siddur! I need to get this house clean and keep it that way!
6. This is the one that isn't so small... I want to get engaged. I want to settle down. I need to break through the one thing that's really blocking me from this.
I hope everyone had a productive fast and was sealed for good in the Book of Life.
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