throwing money at a problem

I think I realized why I was able to pay off those credit cards this month. I got a phone call today from a family I sometimes stay by for shabbos. Things are... not good. She wants a divorce, but her husband won't give her one. He's out of work again. This is a fairly frequent occurrence. He's a hard and dedicated worker but somehow jobs never quite seem to work out for long.

He told her that they don't have enough money to make chicken soup for shabbos (or for her to go to the doctor), but he's planning on taking some $5,000 get-rich-quick course that teaches real estate investment techniques. I could hear the hatred in her voice when she told me of this plan.

The thing, though, that really frightens me is that this man who firmly believes in daas torah wouldn't listen when his rabbi sought him out to tell him that he shouldn't go to this "investment" class. His faith was the only thing he had left-- I'm more than a little worried about him. He's a good man, but his career and family life seem to be in tatters. I can only hope that his not allowing himself to be guided by his rav doesn't mean that he's losing faith entirely.

They are two lovely people who never should have married. I adore them both (when they're not together in the same room).

There is nothing that I can do except offer to be a buffer between them on shabbos and perhaps provide some comfort for their children.

I've offered to ferry the kids to museums and take them to the movies. Coraline is still in the theaters, I think. I haven't seen the movie, but I loved the book. I didn't think there was anything in there that either parent would find objectionable. (They don't have a television in the house, but they do allow movies and secular books.)

I think that this might be a good way to spend some of the money that I'm no longer wasting on credit card interest. (Don't worry, I'm still going to put the rest of the "extra" towards my car loan each month.) It won't really help anything, but it might make the children smile a little. If I could make them forget, even just for an hour, maybe that wouldn't be such a bad thing.

tax refunds and bribes

My tax refunds showed up in my bank account yesterday, so I paid off all my credit cards in full (except for the 3.99% one that I'm treating as a bank loan). That leaves me with my mortgage (5.5%), my car loan (5.99%), the loan from the Bank of Mom and Dad, and that 3.99%-until-I-pay-it off credit card.

The plan is to transfer my credit card payments to my car loan and get that paid off a year and a half early. Then I can decide between putting the car loan payment amount towards the Bank of Mom and Dad, the mortgage or that last low-interest credit card.

But... I was feeling good from having paid those cards off and... (sigh) this is what got me in trouble in the first place. I started a new "I want" list. There's that tznius flannel nightgown I've been eyeing for ages. I also wanted some new pairs of stockings. And a pair of brown boots. I also want a new laptop and a digital camera. And to get my hair colored again.

Of course, my emergency fund is pathetically low, so I really need to start paying attention to that too. It's really not fair to keep going back to the Bank of Mom and Dad every time something breaks at the Lovely Lemon. (I keep telling myself that nothing else can possibly go wrong at the Lemon, but then a pipe bursts or the oven breaks or.... Come to think of it, I really should be saving up for a new oven.)

The nightgown just went on sale and I'm tired of making sure that my skirts are long enough to cover the holes in my stockings, so I treated myself to the nightgown and four pairs of cotton stockings. $500 of the remainder went into my emergency account. I deserve a little bit of reward for paying off those cards, don't I? And while I don't actually need a flannel nightgown, it would make me happy (and make me feel better about turning the thermostat down to 60 degrees at night). The new stockings should have been purchased months ago. I should get some new nylons, for those times when I don't want to look like a Bais Yaakov-wanna-be, but I hate the fact that they develop runs after only being worn once or twice. Stockings make much more sense.

The boots will be my bribe for next month... If I'm good (defined as not charging anything to the credit card that I can't pay off that same month and putting an extra $150 towards my car loan), then I can have the boots. After that, the "I wants" get a little more expensive. I can't exactly treat myself to a third of a digital camera as my monthly bribe. I'll have to figure something out.

I've also been toying with the idea of creating a tzedaka account to make it easier to keep track of my charitable contributions. I sent out a bunch of post-dated checks at the beginning of the year to each place, but I should probably start giving more since I'm having so much success paying things off.

tricky credit cards

I got an interesting reminder this month to keep my eyes open.

From http://www.lowcards.com/2009/01/credit-card-reward-programs-changing.html:

"This month, Chase added a $10 monthly fee and increased the minimum payment from 2 to 5% for cardholders who have carried a large balance for over two years and pay only the minimum each month. "While this minimum payment increase is good for forcing cardholders to pay down their balance, this monthly fee has created an outcry from affected cardholders," says Hardekopf."

It's a good thing that I've started paying attention to the fine print the credit card companies have started sending out. I was one of those who took advantage of Chase's 3.99% balance transfer rate until you pay it off in full. I canceled the card last month when they tried to raise the rate on new purchases. Even though I didn't use that card for anything except the 3.99% balance transfer rate, it was annoying me that they'd raise my rate when I hadn't done anything wrong.

It's a good thing I did, because I'm one of those people who carry a large balance (hey, 3.99% is barely over inflation-- it's lower than my mortgage, so it's going to get paid off last) and make a small payment each month. I would NOT have been happy to see a $10/month fee and increased minimum payment.

Of course, all of my cards are raising their rates now. I guess that's a good thing. It'll encourage me to pay off all my cards (except the one that at a lower interest rate than my mortgage) and stop putting on more than I can pay off in full each month.

I have this bad habit of starting to carry a balance around August each year and not pay it off until I get my tax refund.

winter economy

It's funny how easy it is to take things for granted. I received a letter in the mail from Chase yesterday, telling me that they were raising the interest rate on one of my cards from 8.9% to 13%. Now, it's not a card that I use very often, but I was annoyed that they were raising my rates, so I canceled it. Things seem to be tightening up even for people with good credit scores, it seems. A month ago, this card was offering me a 3.9% balance transfer rate that was locked in at that rate until I paid it off. Now they're trying to raise my rate by 50%.

I called a friend yesterday to complain about the "lousy" raise I got this year. He didn't have much sympathy for me. His employer has frozen all salaries and is starting to institute furloughs.

I know I shouldn't complain. I had a pipe burst last week, but that is covered by insurance. I know I can carve the $500 deductible out of my budget somewhere... But it's easy to get discouraged as I sift through piles of books that were ruined by my flooded basement.

Maybe it's just the winter getting to me. I never did like the cold.

I've been thinking a lot about comment The Rebbitzen's Husband left on my last bog post, the one about the man who was giving so much tzedaka that his family was suffering. The one question that I keep turning over and over in my head is-- should I try to do anything about it? Does my friendship give me the right to interfere?

I haven't been doing much interfering with anything recently. I've been spending a lot of time at home, trying to take care of things. One of my pets passed away, so haven't wanted to spend shabbos away from the ones that are left to me. I think they're mostly through the grieving process now-- or at least I am. I am a single, childless woman in my 30s. Pets are good substitutes for babies or... at least they're the substitutes left to me.

At any rate, I've had a number of shabboses at home to search for clarity and work on myself. I've started to work on my Rosh Hashanah resolutions:

I joined Partners in Torah and downloaded some shirim (although I haven't started listening to them yet.) Also, after shabbos, I sat down and wrote out checks to a number of causes I wanted to support. I hope they won't mind receiving a dozen post-dated $15 checks, but that was the easiest way to put my thoughts into action.

Partners in Torah is interesting. My partner is very nice, but I'm not so sure that I agree with a lot of stuff in the book we're studying. For example, one of the things I learned this week is that I'm supposed to have a dedicated shabbos wardrobe that is nicer than anything I wear during the week. Does she have any idea how much that would cost? Which shul should not get tzedakah money from me this year so that I can do this?

giving too much

I recently discovered that someone I know is insisting on giving 20% tzedakah. Apparently there are special benefits listed in the gamara for people who give that much charity.

Of course, his wife went without a mammogram the other year because they couldn't afford one. His wife and children regularly visit the gamach for their clothing. His son didn't get even get a cake (home baked or otherwise) for his birthday. There isn't a dime put away for their old age.

A friend of mine has offered to assist with an upcoming simcha. What they don't realize, is that she is helping them out with *her* tzedakah money because *they* insist on giving 20% to others.

Sometimes, I wish someone would slip a word to their rav about this.

Is this an isolated instance of insanity, or are other people doing this too?

I suppose I don't have a right to be angry, but this feels wrong on so many levels.

Is Sarah Palin Jewish?

(This post is an expansion of comments I posted on Frumpter's post: Is Sarah Palin Jewish. He, in turn, links to a number of related articles on the web.)

The short answer is: the "articles" I've seen on the Blogosphere offer no proof that she is.

I've been doing Lithuanian Jewish genealogy for only about 10 years, but this article struck me as wrong on a few grounds:

"Further information on Governor Palin's ancestors can easily be found in the vital records in the Lithuanian State Historical Archives in Vilnius."

I wish! Actually, the only known surviving birth/marriage/death records for Vilkavisis that are for birth: 1810-1811; 1876; 1922-1939
for marriage: 1810-1811; 1904/1925 (RECONSTRUCTED RECORDS); 1922-1939
for death: 1810-1811; 1877; 1880; 1922-1923; 1925-1939 (source: rtrfoundation.org search for Vilkavisis). RTR Foundation is an online database of known East European Jewish records.

Anyone who says that a Lithuanian genealogy can be "easily" found in the vital records is lying. LitvakSIG, a group dedicated to obtaining and transcribing Lithuanian Jewish Genealogy records, has been working on pulling these records out for years. It is NOT easy. (As a side note, LitvakSIG is hosted by JewishGen. They announced at the last International Association of Jewish Genealogical Societies (IAJGS) convention that they are in the process of moving to more robust servers. I don't think this has happened yet, so please be understanding if you have issues connecting to the site. LitvakSIG and JewishGen are non-profit organizations supported by donations, so please consider helping them out if you think that their work is valuable and interesting.)

Note that the critical year in the Palin case (1912) is not known to exist (source, record search on http://rtrfoundation.org/). The gaps in the records make it difficult to prove parentage with any certainty. Most of the Marijampole District records that can be obtained have been translated by LitvakSIG volunteers and donations. Note that the records during the time period we're talking about can no longer be obtained as they fall within the EU 100-year privacy blackout. LitvakSIG has some of these records (since the blackout was just instated within the past couple of years), but not all. An interested party can check out what is available on LitvakSIGs All Lithuanian Database and see just how difficult this would be to prove with any certainty.

Then there is another problem with the Jewish Sarah Palin theory:

"The Names Are Altered. At Ellis Island Immigration Centre, the name was entered as Sheeran, a standard practice when immigration officers were unable to understand the pronunciation of non-English speaking immigrants."

This is also less than true. The Ellis Island records were translated directly from the ship manifest. Transcription mistakes did happen, but this "standard practice" nonsense is a bubemeiser. You would need to carefully trace the family tree to see if you could map it back to the Ellis Island records. This can be done, of course. A combination of naturalization records, WWI/WWII registrations, census entries, city directories, voter registrations and U.S. birth/marriage/death records (among others) can be used to pinpoint the immigrant ship manifest even if the immigrant name was different on the manifest. You can then take that information to set up plausible connections to the surviving records in Lithuania (which may include census data, tax records and (if you're lucky, birth/marriage/death records). The Palin-is-Jewish story didn't offer ANY evidence that there is a shred of actual proof beyond "wouldn't it be cool if." You can't simply say that "Green" sounds awfully like "Greenberg," therefore the person must be of Jewish descent! Well, you could, but you would likely be wrong.

The third issue that raised a flag for me:
As for the cemetery, this is what seems to be popping up on Google:
"members of the Sheigam family are buried in the Jewish cemetery Budezeriai"

There may indeed be Sheigams buried in a Jewish cemetery at Budezeriai (I didn't bother to see if I could find the data online), but this is NOT proof that they are related in any way shape or form to Sarah Palin.